lesbian wedding

This coming weekend, the boy and I are attending a lesbian wedding for some good friends. It is my first lesbian wedding and it is not even really a wedding, but a reception. The wedding part is being held privately beforehand, so when I say good friends, I mean good enough for the reception. Which is very perfect because I've pretty much sworn off weddings, funerals and births for the time being, as well as all the subsidiary events these major events lead to (showers, memorial services and babysitting). So I guess we are basically just going to a lesbian party, which makes it really just another Saturday night. At any rate, we've had lots of conversations—way more than seems remotely reasonable—about the wedding present. One of the brides is very dear to me, but also strangely impossible on a variety of levels, and trying to figure out the perfect gift has been taxing. Our mutual friend, Honey Harris, suggested to me that the bride in question had suggested that all they really wanted were gift certificates to Home Depot. This struck me as unsavory for a variety of reasons I was unable to articulate. First, gift certificates always seem like a lame gift (unless you're receiving them, but present buying is all about how it makes me feel, right?). I happened to hear from the bride recently and she disavowed the Home Depot idea, although not very convincingly. The boy and I have had a series of back and forth text messages today about this present buying thing. You would think numerous text messages would lead to a better conclusion than buying a photo album. Anyway, I'm hoping to get the purchase out of the way this afternoon so I can move on to the important issue of: what I'm going to wear. The boy is lucky that he doesn't have to decide this because I've already decided it for him. I am so helpful!